I love that my husband is back home. I truly, truly do. I mean nothing could beat having my partner in crime 24/7 back home with me. But I have to admit that I’m starting to dislike certain things – and I noticed that the things that are annoying me and that I’m disliking is sharing everything again.
I just had 8 months of husband-free solitude, where I had my kitchen, my grocery list, my apartment, my bed, my bathroom, my car, my schedule etc. etc. all to myself. I did not have to think of anyone else with any decisions I made, I did not have to consider anyone else if I decided I wasn’t hungry enough for dinner, I could spread out on the bed, I didn’t have to worry about the bathroom smelling after I used it, didn’t have to worry that anyone else would run out of underwear,
that anyone else would smell my (girly) farts come on you know we all do it, have needs, wants or desires other than mine. I was on my own, independent and living my life as if it were mine and mine only.
Since my husband has returned, I’ve had to re-learn how to share, and I’m finding I’m not so good at it. I like falling asleep before him because then I can “unknowingly” take up more than half the bed, I can control how much covers I get to keep all night and I fall asleep before he starts his
snoring peaceful slumber. I have to think about what we will do for dinner and I’m actually COOKING – I mean like big cooking like stew and lasagna type cooking as opposed to the sandwiches/heat something up/get dim sum for dinner type cooking. In the first three days he was back I cooked a full dinner twice – TWICE! I know that’s not a lot for you family type people, but I did get the opportunity to move back to singlehood (sorta) for 8 months – that means cereal or chocolate bars for dinner if you know what I mean.
I’ve also relinquished my television from Big Bang Theory, How I met your Mother, Food Network, good TMN movies and Project Runway to the Discovery Channel, Violent movies with Arnold Schwartzenneger (sp?), Van Damme & Steven Seagall and the History Channel. The car has been transformed so that the drivers’ seat is almost touching the back seat (listen men, you’re not THAT much taller than us!), the
illegal radar detector man electronic device is back on my car visor preventing it from going down, the radio station is permanently set on 103.5 (seriously) and the A/C is all messed up different. Why? Because “I assumed you’d be too tired to drive baby…”. Riiiggggghhht.
What about the shower? My pristine girl shower that had all nice smelly shampoos and sensitive skin soap with raspberry scented bubble bath is now invaded by head and shoulders, for example. My finally organised countertop has all kinds of man paraphanalia on it and my electric toothbrush is often being found OFF of the charger because he needs to charge his and forgot his charger in the UK. Yes, this makes me want to clear out the second shower that I use as my mop room and force him to shower in there again. Then I remember that when we move to the UK I will only have one bathroom, so maybe I should get used to it now.
Then I get complaints that my hairdryer doesn’t have the “attachment thingee” for him to blowdry his hair. Yes, when my husband decides to be metrosexual he goes all out. He seems to forget that the reason that no attachments fit on this hairdryer anymore was because he melted the casing a few years ago trying to dry out his winter boots, so that the attachments just fall off of it now!
Grrrrr…yes it is frustrating – and I can see you laughing as you read this, but in the end, I have to remember that I was gifted with 8 months of solitude after a decade of living with the Luv Luv. That is an opportunity like none other that most “coupled” women do not get – the opportunity to refind yourself and restart yourself in the middle of a relationship. I just have to get used to being IN the relationship again – good and bad, frustrating and gross and spectacular and humourous. It’s all part of the package. So if you ever catch me complaining again, remind me that the problem is not HIM, the problem is that I need to re-learn to share.